hence you see me here typing a long pile of shit for you to read..
smart ones will also deduce that i've not been depressed for awhile...
or at least i was pretending not to be..
it all sparked off when puaysian asked me who i thought my closest friend now was..
with him being an exception that is...
i thought bout it..as each second ticked by, reality dawned upon me as loud as a steam train roaring pass you..
I DIDN'T KNOW THE ANSWER TO HIS QUESTION
what a damn-ing depressing thought
it seems to me that i've been neglecting all my friends...
or staying away from them..but why? maybe it's cause i feel that they're better off not spending time with me..what a horrible thought but yes..it's there in my head..
even worst! i feel that they're bored with me..horrors! puaysian tells me it's just my imagination..but i can't help it if it's over-reactive can i?
AND with the final physical pharm CA coming up..it's the freaky true or false format again!
it's my academic phobia i tell you..
the last time i had anatomy true or false i flunk it so badly cause for every correct answer, i had one wrong one..
and they took away marks for incorrect answers! argh! i was just squirming away in my seat as i counted my marks as our lecturer went through the test with us..
SUNDAY IS MUGGING DAY!
which is tmrw or today i mean..
sigh..and sometimes i think i have to define my expectations..my expectations are so not realistic man..
guess once i'm able to set my expectections meter right will i then be able to be happy...
had a little sob just now...
felt much better though when i went to the toilet and saw how good i look when i'm sad..SADISTIC..don't tell me..i know...
went out to celebrate puaysian's bdae today..have a few photos to post..and my hair totally was in its best behaviour when i came home and peered into the mirror...
but it'd be too inappropriate to show my lovely hair in the middle of a depressed post wouldn't it?
